Lexicon…(a love story)
“Get off of me!” demanded Cindy.
Ted was hovering over her, sweat beading on his naked chest, with her legs propped up on his shoulders.
“What?” he grunted in mid thrust.
Cindy pulled her legs back and placed her feet on Ted’s chest. Using all of her strength, she pushed and Ted was thrown past the foot of the bed to the floor. Cindy felt as if a cork inside her had popped with the sudden withdrawal as he flew across the bed. Ted sat up on the floor and stared at her - confusion evident in flushed expression.
“Don’t ever say that again,” she said. S
“What?” Ted stood and started crawling back across the mattress towards her. It was obvious that he thought their lovemaking was going to continue. Cindy sat up, nearly kicking him in the face as she spun around, and picked her underwear up off of the floor.
“What are you doing?” asked Ted.
“We’re going to have to lay some ground rules,” she replied as she threw his Government Mule tshirt on over the black lace thong she’d bought last night to make their first time together special. Cindy turned on the bedroom light and Ted shielded his eyes from the glare. She then blew out all of the candles around the bedroom, grabbed a legal pad and from her top drawer and sat back down on the bed.
“Cindy,” whined Ted.
“You can stop rubbing that now,” she quipped.
Ted was about to say something else, but the look she gave him convinced him to remove his hand from his penis and search for his own underwear. A few seconds later, he was relatively decent.
“Alright,” Cindy began, “this will be the list of approved words and phrases to be used during sex.” She drew a line down the center of the page, “And this will be the list of stuff that you should never ever say again.”
“What?” Ted didn’t really like lists. He liked them even less when the lists became the focus of the evening, instead of the sex he was really looking forward to.
“Well, for example,” she began writing on the side for disallowed phrases, “You may never say ‘I’m gonna pound this muffin flat’ again.”
“You told me that you wanted to talk dirty to you while we did it,” defended Ted.
“I’m,” Cindy wrote. “Gonna. Pound. This. Muffin. Flat.”
“It was the heat of the moment. I couldn’t think of anything else to say.”
“Hmmm… Well, that’s what the other side will be for.” Cindy began writing on the right side of the page.
“You may,” she said, “say ‘Oh God, it’s so hot.’ You may say, ‘Damn…it’s tight.’ I will even allow ‘Who’s pussy is this?’ - though only sparingly.”
“I get the point Cindy,” said Ted.
“You could even say, ‘Your cunt’s so perfect, baby.’ Hell, just a ‘Oh God yes’ may suffice.”
“I know. I know. I’ll- ” Ted was agitated…and turned on.
“I mean, I provided encouragement the whole time. I said things like ‘Give me that cock.’ I said ‘It’s so big,’ when really…well…”
“Cindy.”
“Damn it, I even said ‘I love the way it tastes.’ I found tons of encouraging things to say that didn’t sound anywhere remotely as retarded as what you said.”
“I understand,” Ted started to get out of the bed.
“Where the fuck are you going?” Cindy asked.
“To get my pants?” Ted answered.
“The hell you are,” she said as she set the notebook aside. “Get down here and pound this muffin flat.”
